This is “Ugly Gold Couch”. I’m not sure why, but I love her. She is hideously ugly, bright gold, and probably has a history I don’t want to know about. But every time I see her, I just know that someday, she will be in our basement; the couch that our kids will lounge on and watch whatever the 2030 equivalent of a B&W console TV. And that is why she has a website.

We need an animated, levitating, and rotating version on top of the page.